Attention to stop temptation to scream

i'm so fucking pissed and fucked up now that i just can't speak anymore.
i don't even know what to write here.
and all i did just now was to make black paper hearts.
yes, black.

oh gosh.
i don't want to be reminded of being the shit.
being the shadow. now i feel stupid.
urgh.
only spouse knows what it feels like.

i don't care if if my fingers were to break after making all those paper hearts.
i don't care if my mouth bleeds after all that rantings.
i don't care if my eyes pop out after all that staring at the stars hoping they would talk to me.
i seriously don't care.
i just want things to be normal again.

tell me what do you do when it all falls apart

anyways, went to watch spiderman3 with spouse.
i literally spend the whole day with her.
haha(=

spidey was gay basically.
and barney too.
which makes action figure gay too cos he likes barney.
okay, i dont make sense here but never mind.

gahhs, i want to sleep now cos im really tired after all that.

anywhoos.
thanks to spouse for listening to me complaining and ranting all day(:
and thanks to twin too. sorry for bothering while you were studying(:

okay, i'm happy right.
rightttttttt.